All my longings lie open before you, O LORD;
my sighing is not hidden from you.
(Psalm 38:9)
Here, at the bottom of the well, there is an emptiness. When the last trickle has drained into the cracks of the earth, there is a bareness. A stillness. If the heart is a wellspring, mine has lost its lifeblood. It is not broken, and yet its strength has failed. The light has gone from my eyes.
I hear nothing. I speak nothing. I know not what to pray.
And yet, I am not forsaken.
For here, all my longings lie open. There is nothing to hide behind. I have no defence, no strategy, not even supplication. Simply, openness.
The fear of the Lord is in this place.
And it is humility. It is trust. It is stillness.
It is longing.
It is knowing this: You see.
And so I wait.
~lg
S.D.G.
